Plan B

I was curious about buying Plan B over-the-counter, now that years of whinging and whining by the X-Cons (that would be my new term for christian conservative) are over. Well, if not over, at least Hillary and friends set their heels and made it happen. Of course it isn't just put out next to the Sudafed, or whatever. Instead, presumably since it has to do with women and their reproductive rights, one must walk up to the pharmacy counter where they check your I.D. to make sure you're 17 (otherwise you have to have a prescription, which I frankly think should be handed out at freshman orientation). Then, of course, there were the inevitable "moral" refusals by Xtian pharmacists. Although they ostensibly went to pharmacy school where some science and chemistry must have been required, they continue to believe that the pill is an abortifacient. This is retarded, as many people have gracefully pointed out. So a number of women have had bad experiences or a difficult time getting Plan B, even OTC. Being a scientist, and woman of reproductive age, I thought I'd cruise out and see what it's like. It was a Saturday, so keep in mind that had I been in an actual emergency reproductive situation and not been able to get Plan B, it would have decreased significantly or become ineffective by the time I could.

First place: Le Target Super near my house. Note that Target, along with Wal-Mart, allows pharmacists to refuse to fill Plan B, with the codicil that they should allow another pharmacist to fill it. As I walked in, I noticed I was nervous. I really didn't want to go up to a counter and (in effect) say, "I have had or might have irresponsible sex and would like a pill to make it all go away." The woman at the counter was very cool, matter of fact, but when she asked the pharmacist the pharmacist called back that they were out, and that they would be out until "probably Tuesday." By which time a Fetal American might have taken up alien residence status in my womb.

Second Target Super: Ask woman behind the counter. She gives me a look, goes back and gets the last package from the shelf (I am clearly not the only woman in the Durham area who has had or might have irresponsible sex). She asks the pharmacist if she can check me out, not being an actual pharmacist, I guess. The pharmacist says yes, but then leans in and says she doesn't have to if she has a problem with it. I guess she didn't, since she sold it to me ($50, ouch) but I have to say she gave me a seriously disapproving and hard look as she handed it over.

Obviously this is all fairly minor and in no way compares to the trama of a surgical abortion (god forbid, spitting on floor). Still and all, when we have such a culture of silence about sexuality and its consequences, I can definitely see a scenario where someone would be too embarassed to go through the whole thing--if I had been in my small hometown (where I knew many of the pharmacists because I went to school with their children)--I don't think I could have done it.

Why I Write

I write because I have an innate need to write. I write because I can't do normal work as other people do. I write because I want to read books like the ones I write. I write because I am angry at everyone. I write because I love sitting in a room all day writing. I write because I can partake of real life only by changing it...I write because I love the smell of pen, paper and ink...I write because it is a habit, a passion. I write because I am afraid of being forgotten. I write because I like the glory and interest that writing brings. I write to be alone. Perhaps I write because I hope to understand why I am so very, very angry at everyone. I write bcecause once I have begun a novel, an essay, a page I want to finish it. I write because everyone expects me to write. I write because I have a childish belief in the immortality of libraries, and in the way books sit on the shelf. I write because it is exciting to turn all life's beauties and riches into words...I write because I wish to escape from the foreboding that there is a place I must go but--as in a dream--can't quite get to. I write because I have never managed to be happy. I write to be happy. --Orhan Pamuk, 2006 Nobel Acceptance Speech.

FHA

If I had known I would spend my whole goddamned life trying to make other people happy, I would have become a housewife.

Well, it's never too late, I suppose.

Even So

And
did you get what you wanted from this life even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved,
to feel myself beloved on the earth.

--Raymond Carver

It's Orgy and Gluttony Time!

That's right! Our food chain is about to collapse! You think you're important, but it turns out that we really need bees more than we need people. Sorry. And bees are disappearing, everywhere, all over the world, like the dolphins in So Long, And Thanks for All the Fish! So, I think we've got maybe oh, five to ten years before the end of industrialized society as we know it. I say, we make like the Romans and start eating everything in sight and fucking. Otherwise, it's just going to be grim.